Story time!!

[lust]

I really want to be a successful author someday. I highly doubt it though... But one can have dreams right? I'll probably just end up a literature prof. =]

I've been having way to much writers block lately. It's so hard for me to write!!

This was my friend helping me on aim. What do you guys think of the idea? Anyone have any ways to help me improve writing and get over not being able to write in paragraphs like normal people...

SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:10:35 PM): fine another one then
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:10:39 PM): once there was a girl
Nonin77 (6:10:58 PM): i want an original story
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:03 PM): ok
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:09 PM): once there was a girl
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:12 PM): her name was sophie
Nonin77 (6:11:13 PM):
Nonin77 (6:11:16 PM): ok
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:23 PM): she lived in very bad times
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:31 PM): she also lived underground
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:35 PM): everyone did
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:53 PM): anyone who wanted to survive anyway
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:11:56 PM): Why?
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:00 PM): because the sun had become
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:03 PM): and enemy of the people
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:21 PM): too much praise ate away its sense and it decided to play god
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:30 PM): seeing the evils of humans it
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:35 PM): took many many lives
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:46 PM): and eventually other humans caught wind and moved underground
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:12:56 PM): and have been underground for hundreds of years now
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:00 PM): for most its normal
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:07 PM): but for sophie it isnt
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:19 PM): she feels unnatural like somethings wrong
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:27 PM): so one day she decides shes going to
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:31 PM): see whats on the the other side
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:38 PM): what lives above
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:13:57 PM): of course its forbidden to leave
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:00 PM): the underground
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:05 PM): so she has to find a way to sneak out
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:15 PM): which seems quite impossible, especially alone.
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:21 PM): so one day sophie meets a boy
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:26 PM): his name is
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:36 PM): who knows
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:39 PM): some day ill continue
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:41 PM): music time
Nonin77 (6:14:49 PM): =/
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:52 PM):
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:14:55 PM): are you actually reading?
Nonin77 (6:15:00 PM): mhmm
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:15:26 PM): newb
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:15:28 PM): you tell a story
Nonin77 (6:15:50 PM): finish yours first
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:04 PM): SHe meets a boy
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:06 PM): nameeeed
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:09 PM): Jesus.
Nonin77 (6:16:17 PM): uhhuh
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:26 PM): He's a security guard
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:33 PM): for one of the main entrances to the city
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:16:43 PM): which is what sophie has to get through
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:17:03 PM): in order to reach a place that would eventually take her to higher ground
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:17:32 PM): One day sophie 'accidentally' bumps into Jesus
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:17:40 PM): now sophie isnt stupid
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:17:45 PM): sophie is a verrry pretty girl
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:17:59 PM): and it isnt hard to make jesus like her
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:18:10 PM): and eventually convince him to let her through the gate
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:18:19 PM): since normally you have to have the right paperwork
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:18:37 PM): but she convinces jesus to let her pass and they plan
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:18:54 PM): jesus decides he wants to come along much to sophies displeasure
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:18:58 PM): but what can she do?
Nonin77 (6:19:07 PM): wait
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:19:19 PM): what?
Nonin77 (6:19:35 PM): howd she convince jesus?
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:19:57 PM): she doesnt do anything sinful o.o
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:20:03 PM): people dont do that sort of stuff
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:20:19 PM): she tells jesus she wants to leave to see her family in another underground city
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:20:36 PM): but she hasnt gotten approval to leave the city
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:20:53 PM): and her most favored aunt is dying
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:04 PM): so she gives him a nice sob story
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:08 PM): and he believes her
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:13 PM): really sophie has no family
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:16 PM): shes an orphan
Nonin77 (6:21:34 PM): okie dokie
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:39 PM): jesus thinks she leaving the city for another
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:47 PM): not that shes leaving for above ground
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:21:57 PM): so eventually she'll have to ditch him
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:22:00 PM): anyway
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:22:17 PM): but what can she do
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:22:30 PM): She asks him, What about your job?
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:22:51 PM): He replies, I'm tired of living life this way i'd like to go see the world.
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:00 PM): She sighs and shakes her head
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:02 PM): but agrees
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:11 PM): they plan to leave in about a week
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:26 PM): and
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:31 PM): to be continued.
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:41 PM): haha thats actually a story ive been trying to write
Nonin77 (6:23:44 PM): noooo
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:46 PM): free of details though
Nonin77 (6:23:48 PM): keep going
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:51 PM): -.-
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:23:56 PM): yyyyyyyyyyy
Nonin77 (6:23:58 PM): =]
Nonin77 (6:24:07 PM): cause i like it
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:09 PM):
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:13 PM): im leaving soon though o.o
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:17 PM): anyway fine
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:19 PM): a week passes
Nonin77 (6:24:25 PM): dont leave
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:29 PM): and during it they had made slight prep
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:31 PM): i have to?
SaMul2Ai SwEeT (6:24:32 PM): o.O


Now constructively criticize I command it. =]


WOW.. I could have sworn I posted this... but it didnt show up... How awkward.

[Silvarn]

@.@ Gak...! I would highly suggest the next time to put into paragraph form, even if it was written a couple of words at a time. Makes it much easier to read, and therefore comprehend and criticize. In a good way, of course! Plus, it takes up less space.

It's a good start. I can't quite get my mind around it. Either it's the headthrob or the "username(time posted):" stuff is making my eyes cross.

Keep at it! You can only improve. *Just keep telling yourself that, Frodo...oi...*

Oh, and to answer your paragraph-phobia. Just think of it as a long sentence. A bunch of sentences tied together to create one SUPER-SENTENCE *Fanfare* Yay!! Hope that helps! ^.^